Self pity

Nothing from outside can be so devastating as this inside silent clock of self pity. Who knows when it started to measure your failure together with you. At first like little relief (you sure liked that) and then you could even tell someone who is close to you “just how unlucky you are”, if person was polite and ones listened to you with patience she or he did you a big favor. There is nothing wrong with this story.

Problem comes when you don’t recognize how and when self pity started to be more powerful than you. Maybe something really bad happened to you so every person in world would be sad or disappointed. Sure, for a while. Try not to overuse self pity, otherwise self pity will take over control and make you hopeless, powerless. You will be convinced how many possible things are just not possible. It’s  comfortable to be protected with self pity because while you feel sorry for yourself you don’t have to do nothing else. It is somehow connected with laziness and habit to blame other people around you or circumstances for your problem.

Well, it’s like that and it’s simple. If you blame me for writing you this true it’s 100% clear you overuse self pity and it’s time to move on. To wake up, to do something new, fresh, pure (like when we were kids). If someone else have this problem and bothers you with it (told you same story over and over again about “Look, just how unlucky I am”) try to point it out because person is usually not aware who is the main reason for bad emotions. Guess what: it’s always and only you.

First thing, others don’t think much about you at all, second thing it’s all about thoughts that you create. Use thoughts to create healthy environment. People and luck will come to you by themselves. It is not important what happens but how you deal with it, what you create of it. Good and bad will happen every day to everybody (not just you, you and you). Just stop repeating like parrot “just how unlucky I m”, it’s boring, useless, and normal people can hear it only ones.

Much love and respect,

Irena

                                                         Samosažaljenje

Ništa izvana ne može biti tako razorno kao unutarnji tihi sat samosažaljenja. Tko zna kada je počeo mjeriti neuspjeh zajedno s vama. Isprva, kao malo olakšanje (sigurno je godilo) i onda još možeš nekom pored sebe reći: "Ja baš nemam sreće". Osoba je sigurno bila ljubazna i slušala vas strpljivo čineći vam veliku uslugu . Ne postoji ništa loše u tome.

Problem nastaje kad ne prepoznajemo kako i kada samosažaljenje postaje moćnije od nas. Možda se dogodilo nešto jako loše i svaka osoba na svijetu bi bila tužna ili razočarana. Naravno, neko vrijeme. Pokušajte  ne zloupotrijebiti samosažaljenje, inače će ono preuzeti kontrolu i učiniti vas beznadnim, bespomoćnim brbljalom. Još ćete sami sebe uvjeriti da su moguće stvari nemoguće. Ugodno je biti zaštićen samosažaljenjem jer za to vrijeme ne morate učiniti ništa drugo. To je na neki način povezano s lijenošćiu i s navikom da krivimo druge ljude oko sebe ili okolnosti za svoj problem.

To je jednostavno tako. Ako mene krivite za pisanje istine 100% je jasno da zloupotrebljavate samosažaljenje. Vrijeme je za osvještavanje. Treba učiniti nešto novo, svježe, čisto (kao nekoć kad smo bili djeca). Ako netko ima ovaj problem i dosađuje uvijek iznova s tim pokušajte istaknuti to jer osoba obično nije svjesna tko je glavni razlog za loše emocije . Pogodite što: to smo uvijek mi bez obzira što drugi govore i čine.

Prva stvar: drugi ne razmišljaju puno o vama uopće, druga stvar:  sve je u mislima koje stvorite. Koristite misli za stvaranje zdravog okoliša. Ljudi i sreća će doći k vama sami po sebi. Nije važno što se događa već kako se nosite s tim, ono što ste stvorili u danim okolnostima za sebe od onoga što se događa. Dobro i loše će se pojaviti svima svaki dan (ne samo meni, meni, meni). Treba prestati ponavljati kao papiga: "Ja baš nemam sreće". To je dosadno, beskorisno i normalni ljudi tu žalopojku mogu čuti samo jednom.

S ljubavlju i poštovanjem

Irena